It did the same thing when put on the ground. Well, Mr. Bat had his chance. Conveniently, we had a plethora of boxes lying around, so Mr. Animal Control used one to take the bat away in.

As soon as he left, we took the dogs over to the vet. They were both current on their rabies shots, but standard procedure is to give them booster vaccines on day 0 and day 30, just in case. Unfortunately, standard procedure also involves notifying the county about a possible rabies case. Boo.

The county put both Reese and Zero under a thirty day quarantine, even though only Reese was ever actually within chomping distance of the bat. We had to send in official copies of both dogs' pre-existing and booster rabies certificates. Without proof of prior vaccines, the quarantine would be 180 days. The only good part was that we could do quarantine at our house, as opposed to some horrible county facility. Yay for small miracles?

If we got lucky and the bat tested negative for rabies, the quarantine would be lifted immediately. Of course, that did not happen. About a week later I got a phone call saying that the bat tested positively. Only 40 cases a year, and one had to literally land in our front yard.

Everyone managed to survive being cooped up in the house. We received an official letter from the county saying that the dogs were free to roam the streets again. Reese and Zero got their second round of boosters. Apparently their bat encounter was big news at the vet. Every time we went back, someone would ask us if these were the bat dogs.

To add insult to injury, the passenger to our left had a fluffy golden retriever service dog with a big bag of treats. Not only was Zero stuck in the bag, he had to watch the other dog scarf down delicious nom noms. The last straw was when the service dog put the treat mere inches from Zero and ate it practically under his nose. Zero clearly had enough. "GROWL! GRRR GRRR! CHOMP!" That sufficiently enticed the service dog to eat in the aisle.

Zero was super excited to join us for Thanksgiving dinner at Grandma and Grandpa's house. Due to his incredibly strict diet, Zero was only allowed a few iotas of turkey, but he was happy enough to eat his normal food. After dinner, he was the only one still interested in more food.

He wasn't exactly a fan of all the rocking back and forth, but, contrary to what he says, he did survive.

The next morning, after his breakfast and walk, we moved his nest into the bathroom. Just in case something went wrong with his insides, we wanted it to be more easily cleanable.

Matt and I braved the high seas freezing cold harbor to visit the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island like proper tourists. We'd both been there before, though not for years.

Matt punted him out of the seventh floor window. I laughed, yelled, and eventually called the front desk to request that a manager come up.

After a very long twenty minutes that was supposed to be spent driving to the airport, the loss prevention manager arrived. He surveyed the damage and determined that it was merely the molding, not the actual door. He also kept mentioning how we're super awesome for actually telling them about the damage instead of trying to hide it behind a pile of towels. I took both of these as good signs.

Despite his behavior, we did take Zero back home. He even was still allowed another go in business class. Hopefully he enjoyed it, as it is certain to be his last. 

As of today, Thursday, we haven't heard anything about how much the door destruction recompense will be. I'm still optimistic that it will be covered by the standard pet fee.

Print out the the TARDIS template at an appropriate scale for the photo album. For mine, I got lucky and the "Scale to fit" option sized the template perfectly.

Glue the pattern onto the paper mat using the glue stick. You don't want it stuck on particularly well, just long enough to cut out the pieces.

Cutting out the template pieces. And feet.

It is much easier to just cut through the keep pieces along the fancy pink lines shown here.

My Photoshop skills are totally 133t h4xx0r.

Once they are glued onto the album and covered with leather, no one will know. Well, you'll still know. But no one else will if you don't tell them.

Arrange all of the pieces according to the template to make sure everything fits together nicely.

Using pencil, mark the center of the front cover. Draw vertical and horizontal lines through the center. Place one of the vertical keep pieces centered along the vertical line. Mark the top and bottom, and draw horizontal lines there. Finally, find the center between the first horizontal lines and the top and bottom horizontal lines. Draw horizontal lines there.

The first few pencil lines.

I realized it was annoying to draw lines with the cover at a funny angle, so I shoved a book of appropriate height between the covers. It may have been Matt's new book that he happened to have left on the coffee table.

Step 4 - Attaching the template pieces

The eight horizontal pieces.

Glue on the next pair of vertical pieces, making sure they abut all of the horizontal pieces. If there is a tiny gap, it's not a problem since the leather will cover it.

Add the final vertical pieces, leaving a gap approximately the same size as the ones between the first three vertical pieces.

Glue on the top and bottom horizontal pieces. Use the same amount of gap as used elsewhere.

All pieces but the squares.

Finally, the eight squares need to be mounted in the center of the square holes.

All the template pieces glued on.

Whew! All the template pieces should be attached at this point. Celebrate with a well-earned pint of beer. Assuming you don't chug like a heathen, this will provide enough drying time.

Step 5 - Attaching the leather

Cut a piece of leather big enough to cover the entire album, both front and back, with at least a few inches of margin on all sides. Remember, margin is your friend.

Place the leather nappy side up with the album on the right half. Apply contact adhesive to the left side of the leather in the area that will be the front cover. While that dries to a tacky finish, apply adhesive to the entire front cover of the album. Make sure to get the glue in all the little nooks and crannies. Don't get glue on the curved spine area of album or on the corresponding leather.

Glue on the leather and front cover.

Carefully cover the front of the album with the leather, starting from the spine and working towards the edge. Press as you go. Ideally, the glue area on the leather will correspond well with the glue area on the front cover. Working quickly, use Q-tips to press the leather into the details on the cover.

Pressing the leather into the gaps between the template pieces.

Flip everything over, and repeat the process on the back cover. Since there needs to be room for the spine to open, make sure you glue and smooth out the leather while the album is closed. Don't put any glue on the spine. There will be some give when the album lies open.

Lie the album flat open. Trace a 1 1/4" inch border around the entire album. Conveniently, this is approximately the width of a ruler, so you can just place the ruler flat against the album edge and trace it.

Tracing the ruler around the edges.

Cut along the border to remove the excess. Use it make a hat for your pet that's been staring at you the entire time. Check the size of the remaining margin by folding over the top and bottom. If the part over the spine hits the binder rings, remove more leather until it doesn't.

The leather cut to size.

Cover a two inch square with glue at all four corners.

Glue in a corner.

Once tacky, fold the leather in each corner into a triangle and press down so it stays in position.

Triangle of leather.

Along the right and left edge, cover an elongated hexagon with glue.

Side glue.

Fold the leather side over onto the plastic album cover and press down. The double thick parts will require extra pressing down.


The top and bottom should have similar hexagon shapes, except with a gap over the spine. The gap is necessary to provide room to open and close.

Glue along the bottom edge.

Fold the leather onto the album cover just like on the other sides.

Step 6 - Attaching the lining paper

Measure the inside dimensions of the cover. Include the leather, but none of the spine. Subtract an inch from both dimensions, and cut two pieces of the lining paper to that size.

Cutting the lining paper.

Use super glue to firmly attach the paper to the center of each inside cover.

Super glue on the back of the lining paper.

Depending on the leather thickness, it may not perfectly attach where there are multiple layers of leather.

Lining paper glued in place.

To create a real book-like feel, cut two pieces of lining paper to the maximum size that fits in each photo sleeve. Put one in the very front and one in the very back.

Photo sleeve inside covers.

Put the rest of the album pages in the middle.

I could be a hand model.

Let everything dry for at least a few hours.

Finished album

Ta da!