What better way to threaten the opposing team than an inaugural game flyover?



More pictures to follow, pending my acquisition thereof.

Things Jess said today:

"You're my sanest friend."

"In that case, you can have a jigsaw."

And I have two witnesses to both statements.

This is the second year that I have my very own Yahoo fantasy baseball team to screw up. Last year I had no idea what to do or what anything meant, despite working at a fantasy sports company. The RotoHog stock exchange game is so different from standard leagues that I couldn't apply anything but the category abbreviations to Yahoo. Shockingly, I lost with flying colors.

Then came the NBA Ultimate Fantasy Commissioner game and its complete lack of a stock market. The result? I learned how normal fantasy sports leagues work.

Now it's April, my amazingtacular job has disappeared into the aether, and the fantasy baseball season has gotten underway. Everything on Yahoo's site reminds me of something I did for RotoHog, namely the UFC project. I click on a link, I think of what the RotoHog code looked like. I set my line up, I remember how annoying it was to get that working correctly. While my team is doing better (which doesn't take much when you were the proud holder of last place), just using the site make me miss my job.

There are fewer brain-meltingly stupid entities than state governments. However, the California Employment Development Department has found a new way to make my life miserable.

I applied for unemployment after my final day of work. I was going to apply before hand to get it over with, but they said NO. Not a big deal. So eventually I get a little piece of paper that I needed to return. Basically it's a formality where I say, "yes, I did in fact search for work, but alas, I didn't find any, now give me my money." I filled it in for the two weeks indicated, the first two in February, and I mailed it back. I got one slip of paper in the mail saying no money for your first week, you lose. Um, okay. I didn't get the damn check until halfway through March. Attached to the check was the affidavit for weeks 3 and 4 for February. Well, silly me, I filled that form and sent it back.

A couple of days later, I received my response. "YOU ARE A HORRIBLE HUMAN BEING AND YOU ARE SO NOT GETTING ANY MORE MONEY FROM US UNTIL YOU COMPLETE A PHONE INTERVIEW." Specially, I have to tell them why I mailed my February form in 3 weeks late. Uh, because I didn't receive it until then. After all the crap about the EDD being overburdened being repeated by the media, I assumed that it was just taking forever to process my claim instead of being lost in the mail. The worst part? They assigned me the first open interview, which is still over two weeks away.

I can sort of understand why things work this way, but that doesn't make me feel any better. With 1 in 10 unemployed around here, the thought of calling the scary bureaucrats when I had only been waiting a few weeks didn't seem particularly necessary. Now I know better.

I'm not sure who enjoyed the experience less, but Zero is officially done with his antibiotic eye drops. Thankfully, that also means he is officially done with his Cone of Malcontent. So what does a newly freed hyperactive little mutt do first? Lick his crotch for thirty minutes. *slurp*